Change

Fast Llamas,

Good morning!  I am up early today since I passed out on the couch last night before 9:00.  My husband woke me up and put me to bed. I think he was happy for me, since I rarely get to bed early.  But, this got me thinking, why, all of a sudden I am sleeping so early?  What is my mind and body telling me?  

This week I made a huge decision about my job.  I took an offer to leave my high school (and my position as an instructional coach) to join a team focusing on classroom behavioral management.  This team supports schools across the district and instead of supporting just one content department on campus, I am now supporting schools at all contents and levels.  I am leaving a great school with people who I love... whom I trust and will miss tremendously.  I feel like an idiot to leave, to leave a place with positive momentum, yet, I am pulled to this new opportunity. In a conversation about leaving, a very wise person told me "there was an itch there, lean into it".  I feel fear and guilt and excitement and joy... it's a weird emotion.  To say I am stressed is an understatement.  

Let's talk about stress, there are different kinds:

Healthy Stress - eustress is stress brought on by momentary decisions and life.  They rarely cause issues with health and most people learn to deal with these moments with good habits.  Waking up a little earlier to help get out the door on time in the morning, or choosing your outfit the night before, putting your keys and wallet in the same place every day, are all examples of little things we do to help aid in reducing feelings of stress.  We build resilience to this type of stress too, as we learn the "ins and outs" of tasks, what once felt stressful, now is routine.  

Acute Stress - When chosen, acute stress builds resilience too. When we choose to ride that roller coaster or go out on stage, we are making choices. This type of stress doesn't hurt our mind or body.  Imposed acute stress can lead to trauma, examples include living through a disaster, grief or illness. With time, the mind and body heal however, in the meantime, the body is vulnerable since the immune system is affected.

Chronic Stress - Both mild and severe stress impacts the mind and body due to the length of time involved.  The stress does not diminish, so the immune system doesn't have time to recover and inflammation never gets reduced.  The longer the stress, the longer it takes to recover if ever.  People under the influence of chronic stress exhibit changes in personality (grumpy, quick tempered to unengaged and quiet).  

According to Eric Jensen's research on stress and its impact on teaching, stress can lead to the following outcomes:

How Chronic Stress Impacts You and Your Students
Here are some of the evidence-based implications of chronic stress:

• Chronically stressed teachers tend to have the poorest student outcomes, such as lower grades and frequent behavior problems.
• Chronically stressed teachers have higher rates of sickness, absenteeism, and accelerated aging signals.
• Chronically stressed teachers impact student achievement for months. For example, teachers’ depressive symptoms in the winter negatively predicted students’ spring mathematics achievement.
• Students with weaker math achievement made greater gains in higher-quality classrooms with less depressed teachers.

Jensen goes on to say...

"Our brain has two “filters” over which you have some control. The two are 1) the perception of relevancy of the situation/event and 2) your sense of control over the situation/event (coping tools).

You could become so cold-hearted that you make everything irrelevant to you. Or, you could develop such extensive time-off resources (key contacts, valet, a private jet to fly you to the Bahamas, a masseuse, etc.) that you can handle most stressors pretty well. In short, relevance and perceived control are the two biggest “brain filters” that determine whether or not you’ll feel stressed.

This means that thinking your students, the principal, or your students’ parents are stressing you out is misplaced blame. They don’t stress you out. Your students do not have superpowers to do that. You stress you out (Godoy, Rossignoli, Delfino-Pereira, Garcia-Cairasco, & de Lima Umeoka, 2018).

So, the real reason for this blog this week is to talk about SKILLs to deal with how you are feeling.  The above information is kind of the bad news, let's talk about the good news.  When I shifted from the thinking of dealing with emotions and stress by pushing them down and suppressing them, to pushing through them and expressing them (in healthy ways), my mental and physical health improved.  I remember a particular stressful period in my life when we moved across the state, I told my husband, "just let me cry, don't try to make it better or easier, I just need to get it out and release these feelings,"

A lot of advice comes in the form of "setting boundaries" of the time teachers devote to the work they do.  But, it is challenging to put down the work (that has to get done) until later.  Because "later" shows up with even more to do.  Building a skill set of how to deal with the work and the stress that comes with it, is helpful.  

Here's four things you can do (so you don't end up crying) to deal and build resilience to stressful situations.

Mindfulness

I know what you are thinking?  You are asking me to meditate? Isn't that kind of mystical stuff?  I thought so too, but I started dabbling into it a few years ago.  I have tried different apps, Apple currently is offering one free year of their app Balance and I like Calm, but with both, they required subscriptions to unlock packages.  After listening to Brene Browns podcast interview of Dr. Amishi Jha, though I got more interested.  I read this:

And am sold on meditative practices.  I meditate for about 12 minutes a day... the goal is 20 minutes and someday I will get there.  This week was super stressful for me, but, I feel like my "bounce back" to normalcy is quicker than in the past.  After meditating, I feel sharper and clearer.  I don't use music, narration or chimes.  I don't have a special rug or room,  I just sit and focus on the breath. So, simple it's mind blowing.

Gratitude Practices

Do you set time aside each day to reflect on the blessings of your life?  I started practicing gratitude with a daily gratitude journal about 2 years ago.  In my daily journal,  I reflect on things I am grateful for and things I am looking forward to, you could add or change it to things your are optimistic about.  People who stop to reflect on these ideas have improved health, high levels of life and work satisfaction and lower levels of depression and stress.  Simply reflecting, noticing and appreciating the positive things is your life is a game changer in terms of managing your stress levels.  It has changed me as well.  I spend a lot of time noticing things that I can be grateful while I go about my day.  Somethings are small, like a good cup of coffee, some things meaningful, such as laughter or trust, some things are life changing, like the health of my parents and children.

Diet

While the first two stress management tools I find easy to practice, my diet could be improved.  Why I have such a difficult time taking a daily vitamin is beyond me, but I struggle.  I also tend to snack on carbs late in the evening.  Every day I proposed to not eat past 6 pm... each day I struggle.  So, for me this is a challenge... but, I work on it each day.  I have to be careful too, there was a time that I dealt with stress by depriving my body of food, getting down to near 110 pounds at my lightest at one point in my life. On a particular stressful day this past week I didn't eat at all. So I am mindful of both extremes.  

Eric Jensen suggests:

Change what you eat, and you change both your body and mind. To do this, pick one micro 60-second or less habit. For example, limit yourself to only one drink (soft drink, beer, or wine) a day. After a month, limit yourself to one a week. Or another example, you can limit yourself to one sweet item a day. Then after a month, limit yourself to just one a week. You can make the changes that will change your life. Start today.

Exercize
Do people feel better when they exercise? Of course they do!  Do I know I should exercise each day? yes! Does that mean I do each day? Nope!  Like diet, I struggle with this too.  I used to run, but it hurts my body too much, so I walk about 2 to 3 miles a day.  Making it a daily habit takes effort... like all things, I need to make it important to myself.  

Teaching is stressful because it is important work.  But, like it is said in the safety training before each airplane flight.  You put the oxygen mask on yourself FIRST, before you help others who cannot help themselves.  Be sure you are taking care of yourself first. But, this takes effort and a shift in your perspective and actions.  But, with all things, effort creates ability. The work is worth it.